![](http://www.datadoctors.com/media/radio/_images/Examine-Contract.jpg)
Dog's pet peeves against humans
Tuesday, March 28, 2006 @ 6:47 PM
1. Blaming your farts on me... not funny... not funny at all!!!
2. Yelling at me for barking.. I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG, YOU IDIOT!
3. Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly whose walk is this anyway?
4. Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose... stop it!
5. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.
6. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Whoooo Hoooooooo what a proud moment for the top of the food chain.
7. Taking me to the vet for "the big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back!
8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.
9. Dog sweaters. Hello ???, Haven't you noticed the fur?
10. How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth, you're just jealous.
Now lay off me on some of these thing's. We both know who's boss here!!! You don't see me picking up your poop do you???
DOGS ALWAYS OFFER UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. CATS HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT.
Two Guys on writing
Saturday, March 25, 2006 @ 7:01 PM
2. Hal Duncan (link via Anna Louise Genoese)
Read'em, then go forth and write. (and lose the *purple crayon).
A woman from the Inside Out.
A woman from the inside out.
Secrets revealed
Friday, March 24, 2006 @ 7:42 PM
More of the same.
So this week-end, I've kept my calendar free (for the last couple of months I've been a real social butterfly, going out every week end. Who knew I had a life.). But this week-end I write. And just to make myself accountable, I'll post my results.... daily.
*gulp*
![Nervous](http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/4/4_6_200v.gif)
**Saturday update/check in at 11pm: 4 pages. Not bad. Not great. But I got a whole bunch of other stuff done (which need to be done): doctor visit, banking, groceries and more. Tomorrow I hafta to my taxes, hit the gym, a couple of other things, and write. Honestly if I only get another 4 pages down, it'll still be better than nothing. :-P The main thing is, I'm writing again.
*~*~
Update/check in for Sunday's results: 3 pages. Yeah, worse. But I my defense.... my taxes still aren't complete. I'll just leave it at that.
*~*~
On another topic, I bought one of those memory foam mattress toppers. Not the Tempur-Pedic one, which costs as much as a freakin mattress (in the ball park of $2K--starting price--here in Canada) but a cheaper 'on sale' brand. My mattress isn't top o the line, but it has a couple more years of bounce left in it. Then I just had to get some loverly new sheets and a new duvet cover/pillow sham ensemble (also on sale) to go with it. ::happy smile::
![](http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7866/598/320/kitty.0.jpg)
Blah post.
Thursday, March 23, 2006 @ 6:15 PM
uhm, yeah.
Sooo.....
Steph and Larissa sold recently!!! A collaborative effort that netted them a three book deal! (Major, major, congratulations, ladies!)
I'm also trying to plot with color-coded post-its for a change. Progress: slow but sure. It's funny, I'd say I was a character-driven writer, but I keep wanting to do these elaborate plot lines. I'll start out with a simple Jack and Jill went up the hill storyline, then start fleshing out motivation and next thing you know, Jack's a cross dressing ninja and Jill's a disgraced federal judge, ex-ballerina, and they have to save the world from glue-sniffing vampires. Go figure.
At this point in the planning, I can pick out (at least) 3 plot lines: The romance development and 2 mystery subplots, but they're all intertwined (which is good) so it's giving me a bit of a headache. I obviously need to tackle this problem, just about every single time I've gotten 'stuck' in the last year, it was because of plot.
On the other hand...
Here's a piccie of the hero. He's pretty inspirational, dontcha think?
![](http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7866/598/320/IMG_0855.jpg)
Cleaning Hunk
Saturday, March 18, 2006 @ 10:47 PM
![](http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger/7866/598/320/365139/cleaning%20Hunk.jpg)
Reading Roundup
Sir Apropos of Nothing
"An antihero for the 21st century, Apropos springs from his mother's womb with a full set of teeth, ready to bite anyone who gets in the way of his survival in this fast, fun, heroic fantasy satire."
The book was a hoot. Very much the same sensibility of The Princess Bride. And Apropos is a most unlikely hero. He prettymuch stumbles into being a hero 'despite' his best (worst?) efforts. Think Jayne from Serenity. (Well, Jayne with red hair and a bum leg, but with all the self-serving self-centerness intact.)
The Woad to Wuin
"This sequel to the wildly successful Sir Apropos of Nothing (2001) starts off with a bawdy send-up of Lord of the Rings, but quickly segues into its own territory with the appearance of a mysterious Visionary at Apropos's bar, Bugger Hall.'
This book continues the adventures of Apropos. Still fun, especially the character Bellicose, who really is bellicose. All his dialogue is written in ALL CAPS. lol. The only quibble I have with these books is sometimes the author goes on a bit much with the backstory/internal musings. But nine times out of ten there's necessary information given. Still, I think the info could've been conveyed more consisely. I plan to continue reading the series.
I tried to read The Rosary Girls. I think this one is on the bestsellers lists. I'm not sure why I lost interest but one of the main things that niggled was the female detective character.
At first she read like a woman written by a man (if that makes any sense.) Then I thought, no, she actually reads like a man mascarading as a woman. Seriously, you could have taken out all references to girly things like lipstick, whatnot, and you'd have a guy. Sort of the opposite of Lynn Viehl's (S)Heroes-- Girl in a Man Suit. Richard Montanari writes very, very, well. I really liked how he made the setting of Boston come alive--almost another character. (Made me want to watch Mystic River again). I put the book back in my TBR pile, to try again later, it could have just been my mood.
My next failure: Greg Iles' Blood Memory. Too much dialogue and backstory (pet peeves for me). The heroine was very interesting, though: A recovering alcoholic who finds herself pregnant by her married lover, whom she happens to work with-- she's a forensic dentist (I'm sure that's not the right term, but you get the idea) and he's a detective.
I was more interested in their personal relationship/development, than I was in the 'crime/mystery'. These were really, really, really flawed characters. (no shit, right? heh.) Not your garden variety romance couple, that's fo' sho. But the 'yap yap yap yap' approach to unravelling/uncovering clues, combined with the backstory/info dumps ultimately didn't work for me.
The book was close to 700pages long (I think) it would have easily been 1/3 shorter. I can't remember where I started to skim, but I did just to find out the conclusion to the mystery and the relationship. Lots of twists and turns to this one, it might work for you. I'll say again, the characterization was well done.
Last night I finished George R.R. Martin's Fevre Dream. Excellent vampire/horror story. Great characterization of the main pov protagonist, and a wonderful depiction of steamboating, and the way of life on the river in Mississippi during the late 1800s.
If I had a disappointment, I wish we got into the pov of the vamps, particularly the 'hero' vamp, Joshua York, and the 'villian' bloodmaster, Julian Damon. Also, there were a couple of romantic liasons for Joshua that were skimmed over; my romance writer/reader heart, wishes these were explored more fully and the eroticism of the relationships explored more. Despite the cover, there's really no 'heat' in this book (the supine nude chick is misleading.) Anywho, I highly reccommend this one. Just wonderful!
The next two books I'm in the middle of reading:
Like Water for Chocolate. I unearthed this one when I did ruthless slash and burn through the to-be-read pile recently. It's absolutely delightful. It's a magical Cinderalla/love story that takes place during the turn of the century Mexico. Here's a bit of the blurb on Amazon:
"Each chapter of screenwriter Esquivel's utterly charming interpretation of life in turn-of-the-century Mexico begins with a recipe--not surprisingly, since so much of the action of this exquisite first novel (a bestseller in Mexico) centers around the kitchen, the heart and soul of a traditional Mexican family. The youngest daughter of a well-born rancher, Tita has always known her destiny: to remain single and care for her aging mother. When she falls in love, her mother quickly scotches the liaison and tyrannically dictates that Tita's sister Rosaura must marry the luckless suitor, Pedro, in her place. But Tita has one weapon left--her cooking. Esquivel mischievously appropriates the techniques of magical realism to make Tita's contact with food sensual, instinctual and often explosive."
Once I finish the book, I'll be watching the movie. At least I hope there's a movie.
Or is it Chocolate with Johnny Depp I'm thinking of?
Nope. There's a movie, and it looks every bit as sensual as the book. Talk about sexual tension. Yeeeowwh!!
Last but not least, I've been following along on the adventures of Alexander McCall Smith's The No.1 Ladies Dectective Agency. The Kalhari Typing School for Men is another treasure unearthed from the to-be-read pile. These books are more character studies and 'snap shots' of life in Botswana, than they are true mysteries; but I do enjoy the little cases that Mma Precious Ramotswe works on.
For that reason, I didn't enjoy this books as much of the previous entries and I think that's because the first 'mystery' doesn't present itself till about page 100. I'll still continue to read the series, Mr. McCall Smith has a very elegant, spare way of writing that's undemanding, but evocative. Perfect bedtime reading.
Next up is Kristin Hardy's recent release: CAUGHT.
Although I have several BLAZE books in my tbr pile, I haven't actually read one in 2-3 yrs, so this should be interesting. The bits of the book I've skimmed sucked me right in (main reason I bought it). I think the author's voice works for me; the characterization seems solid and the story/premise interesting).
Well, that's it. Later Gators.
Keep On Keeping On
Thursday, March 16, 2006 @ 8:15 PM
In a nutshell the moral of this tale is: Don't give up. Believe in yourself.<--link to transcript here.
The ABCs of Jaye
Wednesday, March 15, 2006 @ 9:03 PM
![](http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7866/598/200/ABC_Blocks_small.0.jpg)
B is for Booze of choice: Chocolate Martini
C is for career: Underwriter
D is for your dog's name: Since we broke up, I never mention his name.
E is for essential items you use everyday: Mascara, moisturizer, computer.
F is for favorite song at the moment: Folsome Prison Blues (Johnny Cash), Who Do You Love, (LL Cool Jay), Boogie On Reggae Woman (Stevie Wonder).
G is for favorite games: Head. (joking)
H is for hometown: Toronto.
I is for instruments you play: Viola.
J is for jam or jelly you like: I prefer marmalade.
K is for Kids: 1 boy.
L is for last kiss: *sigh* next.
M is for most admired trait: Sense of humor.
N is for the name of your crush: none.
O is for overnight hospital stays: 1 (to give birth).
P is for phobias: roaches. ugh.
Q is for quotes you like: 'If you keep doing what you're doing, you'll keep getting what you're getting."
R is for biggest regret: Not pursuing career in architecture.
S is for sweets of your choice: baklava.
T is for the time you wake up: 6:30am.
U is for underwear: th-th-th-th-thongs. Or boy shorts.
V is for vegetable you love: Just about all of em.
W is for worst habit: Procrastination.
X is for x-rays you've had: 2 for chest pains (stress related) foot pain (bone spurs).
Y is for yummy food you make: I'm a pretty decent cook overall. Nothing in particular stands out.
Z is for zodiac sign: Leo.
Joke
Friday, March 10, 2006 @ 5:55 PM
"Hello?" she cried, but no answer.
"Is there anyone here?" she cried a little louder, but still no answer.
Now the female brain cell started to feel alone and scared and yelled at the top of her voice,
HELLO, IS THERE ANYONE HERE?"
Then she heard a faint voice from far, far away..............
![](http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7866/598/320/lonelybraincell.jpg)
Ouch!oUcH!OuCh!Ouch!oUcH!OuCh!
Thursday, March 09, 2006 @ 6:25 PM
![](http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7866/598/320/ouch.1.jpg)
Although I check in on Ms. Giggles regularly, it was Raine gave me the heads-up on this review for Laurell K Hamilton's latest release.
wow.
Duh.
Wednesday, March 08, 2006 @ 6:03 PM
The Oscars
Monday, March 06, 2006 @ 8:12 AM
Here's another round up with piccies over on Truth, Beauty, Love.
If you missed the opening credits/skit or the announcement (upset) of best movie (CRASH) here they are. I haven't seen any of the pictures nominated, except for CRASH and I thought it was a fabulous movie. Very pleased it won.
I thought FourFour would have something up on the OSCARS, he does hilarious synopses of shows like Project Runway and America's Next Top Model. But he has nothing up (yet).
Gazes Galore!
Saturday, March 04, 2006 @ 7:59 AM
![](http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7866/598/200/gazing.jpg)
Heck, there are whole herds of gazes grazing on my pages. Inevitably, they are culled.
My hero(ine)'s gazes also have superpowers, they can size up the opposite sex, within a millisecond (Warning: objects on the page may take longer to assess than in real life)-- not only age, height, and weight, but also the turquoise and gold flecks floating in the depths of emerald 'gazes'. Streaks of rich auburn in glossy chestnut tresses are pin-pointed, and confidence aquired that waists could be spanned with one hand. The hardness (iron) of biceps, chest and thighs is judged, along with other other, a-hem, iron-like accoutrements (ie: hero's hung like a horse) in the thigh area. Lips are pronounced soft, cruelly thin, or colored like cherries. All this knowledge acquired from just....one....gaze (and 5 paragraphs).
Example from the current wip:
“Why not execute me here?” she snapped, control breaking, and looked at him for the first time.
She already knew he was a large man, overwhelming in breadth and height, but now she saw the heavy jaw and crooked nose. He wore his hair extremely short; yet even in the dimness it shone golden, lighter by several shades than his brows and neatly trimmed beard and moustache.
His shirt was rough-spun cambric. His long coat made of thick supple leather that swept down to where his pants tucked into a pair battered boots.
From a sheath strapped to one powerful thigh, the handle of a dagger stuck out, while the hilt of his sword rose at a slant behind his broad shoulders.
But it was his gaze that cautioned her from further outbursts: Light in hue, dark in contemplation.
Honestly? I rather like that example. But the dreaded romance novel 'inventory gaze' can go horrible, horrible wrong, setting one's teeth on edge in a frothing backwash of cliché after cliché.
Over on the Jennifer Crusie/Bob Meyer's blog-- He Said, She Said-- JC makes a very good argument for keeping those 'looks' to a minimum and how to use them in the most effective way to reveal character. Take a gander. (yuk,yuk,yuk)
Publishing, Pigeon-holes & Race
Thursday, March 02, 2006 @ 7:31 PM
![The grass really is greener over here.](http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7866/598/200/keepout..jpg)
Anywho, I just ran across a series of well presented/thought out, non-inflammatory posts over on the Buzz, Balls & Hype blog. The posts are from several bloggers of 'non-wasp' backgrounds regarding their experiences with being marginalized (or feeling the threat of it) in one way or the other because of their 'what-you-see-is-all-you-know-about-me' race.
Guest blogger, T.J Meyers started the ball rolling with her take on the situation for AA writers. (In many, many ways, she could have been writing about me.) Then Tess Gerritsen--an Asian-American Author--weighed in. Finally, Leora Skolkin Smith tells how her initial elation that the words 'Israel' and 'Palestine' were going to be added to her book title became something she now rues.