The Top 100 Things I'd Do If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord

Friday, May 26, 2006

"Being an Evil Overlord seems to be a good career choice. It pays well, there are all sorts of perks and you can set your own hours. However every Evil Overlord I've read about in books or seen in movies invariably gets overthrown and destroyed in the end. I've noticed that no matter whether they are barbarian lords, deranged wizards, mad scientists or alien invaders, they always seem to make the same basic mistakes every single time. With that in mind, allow me to present... "





7. When I've captured my adversary and he says, "Look, before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?" I'll say, "No." and shoot him. No, on second thought I'll shoot him then say "No."

15. I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find that such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 117 and the hero is just putting his plan into operation.


22. No matter how tempted I am with the prospect of unlimited power, I will not consume any energy field bigger than my head.



This guy is on to something. I think I've seen all the movies in which he did *not* star. heh.
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2 comments:

mini-vinnie-me said...

If (re: when) I become an Evil Overlord, I'm gonna make it that ya can't make movies where the Evil Overlord gets overthrown.
Hopefully then, by te Evil Overlord never being overthrown in the movies, real life will follow, and I'll forever be the Evil Overlord.
Mwa-ha-ha
MWA-HA-HA!

Jaye said...

How did I miss this post before? Hey minnie, nice to see you here. As for the eeeevil Overlord, I'll leave you to it. I find the methods of retirement from that profession somewhat unexpectant, and extremely unpleasant. *gg*

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