A few pointers on mammograms (joke)

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Ladies

Don't forget to make your appointment this year !!!!


Mammograms
Many women are anxious about mammograms, but there is no need to worry.
By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceding the exam and doing the following exercises, you will be totally prepared for the test and best of all, you can do these simple exercises right in and around your home.

EXERCISE ONE:

Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast in door. Shut the door as hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure.

Hold that position for five seconds. Repeat again in case the first time wasn't effective enough.

EXERCISE TWO:

Visit your garage at 3AM when the temperature of the cement floor is just perfect. Take off all your clothes and lie comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled.

Turn over and repeat with the other breast.

EXERCISE THREE:

Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of your breasts.

Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Set up an appointment with the stranger to meet next year and do it again.

YOU ARE TOTALLY PREPARED!

AND, just a thought for all the women out there........

MENtal illness, MENstrual cramps, MENtal breakdown,
MENopause............



Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men?.........And

When we have real trouble it's HISterectomy!!!!

Send this to all women to have a laugh AND, don't forget to have a
mammogram!!!!!!

A Friend Is Like A Good Bra...
Hard to Find
Supportive
Comfortable
Always Lifts You Up
Never Lets You Down or Leaves You Hanging And Is Always Close To Your
Heart!!!
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2 comments:

Tara Marie said...

I'd like to send this one to my doctor and insurance co. Got a call last week from the insurance co bribing me with gift cards if I would go for a mammogram. I called for an appointment, but I'm not happy about it.

Jaye said...

After doctor 'gently' suggested that I book for one this year....

I will. But I'm soo not looking forward to it.

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