Local Pub (Joke)

Monday, October 09, 2006

A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full beard.

"Are you the manager?" she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands.

"Actually, no," the man replies.

"Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him," she says, running her hands beyond his beard and into his hair.

"Can't," breathes the bartender. "He's not here. Is there anything I can do?"

"Yes, there is. I need you to give him a message," she continues, running her forefinger across the bartender's lips and slyly popping a couple of her fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.

"What should I tell him?" the bartender manages to say.

"Tell him," she whispers, "there is no toilet paper, hand soap, or paper towels in the ladies room."
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6 comments:

Marg said...

Can you say Eeeewwwwww!

Hah...my word verification was sownwild!!

Pamela Tyner said...

I agree..eeeewww. But funny!

vanessa jaye said...

LOL. I think everyone's first reaction is Ewwwwwww! But funny as hell. And I'll admit to a certain schardenfreude (in terms of the bar manager). I can't count the amount of times I've been in some stupid publich washroom that was out of toilet paper/soap! grrr. (Paper towel's not such a biggie). Luckily I usually have tissues & Purell in my bag.

Don't think I've seen you ladies here before. Thanks for dropping by. :-)

Dee Tenorio said...

hahaahahahaha! I'd read that to my mother, but she'd be gagging for days. :)

Tara Marie said...

yuck and double yuck, but funny!

Anonymous said...

Well told.

Cheers!

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