HOW TO WRITE GOOD?
by Frank L. Visco
1. Avoid alliteration. Always.
2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
3. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat.)
4. Employ the vernacular.
5. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
6. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.
7. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
8. Contractions aren't necessary
9. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
10. One should never generalize.
11. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said: "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."
12. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
13. Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.
14. Profanity sucks.
15. Be more or less specific.
16. Understatement is always best.
17. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
18. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
19. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
20. The passive voice is to be avoided.
21. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
22. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
23. Who needs rhetorical questions?
And even more on How to Write Good, but by Michael O'Donoghue.
Here is Gareth's tips on suck-less writing
How to Write Sex. Hint: start by doing lots of firsthand research. ::snort:: Seriously, I take issue with #7, I'm real....
Skidmore's Guide to writing.
Just some things to think about, nothing is cast in stone; some stuff I strongly disagree with.
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5 comments:
That should be "profantity (*@$()#$ #$)(*#$&(@(#$(*$^&!@(@# SUCKS", dontcha think *g*?
Thanks for the links! Forgot a book to take along this weekend so I'll probably read them. Twice.
The 'How To Write Good' article is hilarious!
Hmmm...and in the "How to Write Sex" article, also disagree with #7, don't completely agree with #5a (it CAN happen)---but I've got #1 down to a fine art.
The sex list is hilarious.
WTF is alliteration? LOL
Grr. Blogger ate my comment. But really, it just amounted to LOL! *g*
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