Life is sexually transmitted.
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich!
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
Some people are like a Slinky.....not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars, but a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
4 comments:
Very true, especially the last one.
I like the internet one. I like anything that stps random people from bothering me, but I don't have the patience to teach anyone anything anymore.
Good thing I stopped teaching, huh?
Wonderful. I'm stealing some of these.
One I found tonight while reading epigrams: "Popularity is a razor in the hands of a child."
I can only shake my head at that last one, Jordan. Too true. But my favorite one is the weather comment. There are many times I have to step back and remind myself to not give a shit.
er, yeah Steph. Real good thing. gg.
Ooo, I like that one, pbw, I'd even amend 'child' to 'the immature and those lacking self confidence.' Not as catchy, but truer.
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